The primary need of everyone is to survive; above all else, we have a survival instinct that we can’t ignore.
If the first years of your life were less than perfect, and let’s be honest, they probably were; your emotional needs weren’t met. You might have been the victim of physical or emotional abuse, neglect, bullying, absent parenting, strict upbringing, poverty, war, or general unconsciousness and probably live in survival mode with survival emotions such as fear, uncertainty, doubt, stress and anxiety, at the forefront of your mind.
Everyday things that didn’t affect your siblings might have affected you. Your parents unfavourably compared you to them. Comments were made about how much they sacrificed. Maybe they were absent, caught up in their own life and you had to fight for their attention or worse, you didn’t get it when you needed it badly. Maybe they were fearful and said you’d never amount to anything if you didn’t work hard enough.Read More
THE IDENTITY DETECTIVE
I'm very excited to share with you an excerpt from my latest self-help book, The Identity Detective.
Find Your Purpose
I was inspired to write this by my nephew Tom Daley who achieved gold at the Tokyo Olympics yesterday. At 11 years old, he declared to the world that he wanted to win a gold medal and at 27...he achieved his dream. What did it take? In his case, sheer hard work and determination, picking himself up time and again, brushing off every failure or bad dive and starting over, but what about you?
What a time to be alive! A pandemic that has seen the whole planet grind to a halt. Banks and businesses are closed, schools and shops, cafe’s, restaurants, factories and flights, but the biggest shock?… The pubs are closed and how the hell are we supposed to cope with that?
It took me forty five years to introduce boundaries into my life. It wasn’t easy and it didn’t make me popular, particularly with my children who could no longer intrude on my space without being called on it. My friends and family noticed the change as my compulsion to only speak my truth became apparent, but what does it mean to have boundaries in your life and what are boundaries?
The Aliveness of Life
I heard this expression yesterday and it got me thinking. Am I living the aliveness of life? Something that can only be experienced in the present moment, because the present moment is the only place where the ego cannot survive.
What is Your Paradigm?
We don’t see the world as it is, we see it as we are.Our lens defines how we see it. If we look through a lens of negativity and judgement, life will seem hard. If our lens is positivite and happy, success and love are more available to us.
Circle of Harmony
My spiritual journey had always been based on my life flowing in a circle of harmony, instead of the sabotage and resistance I practiced on a daily basis. However, caught up in my own chaos, I believed such peace was beyond my reach. I was too immersed in my pain and in a weird way, I liked it that way. My struggle was real, it was familiar and at least I was in control, or so I thought.